The 40-Year-Old Virgin (R/unrated)
IMDb; Rotten Tomatoes; TV Tropes; Universal; Wikipedia
streaming sites: Amazon; Google Play; iTunes; Vudu; YouTube

This movie came out on August 19, 2005, just about a month before I turned 30. Of course I didn't see it then, as I almost never get a chance to go to the movies, and anyway it didn't seem like the kind of movie I'd be interested in. (I'm a bit of a prude, and generally don't like sex comedies.) Still, sometime later... I don't recall exactly how much later, but I'd guess between one and three years after it came out... the thought occurred to me that it would be amusingly "meta" to watch it for the first time on my 40th birthday (September 21, 2015). That is to say, to watch "The 40-Year-Old Virgin" as a 40-year-old virgin. (Oh, I absolutely assumed I'd still be a virgin at 40, and I was absolutely right.) Not only that, but considering the figurative meaning of "virgin," I would also be a 40-year-old "40-Year-Old Virgin" virgin. But when I finally did watch the movie, I would lose my "40-Year-Old Virgin" virginity (but still be a literal 40-year-old virgin). Oh, man, the meta-ness of the thought amused the heck out of me, so I've been looking forward to it for years, now. (Again, not sure how many years exactly, but surely the better part of a decade.) And now here it is... my 40th birthday. And I'm watching the DVD (which is unrated and 17 minutes longer than the theatrical version, though the streaming links above are to the 'R' version; you can also find the unrated version on most of those sites).

Well. Of course I couldn't help but try and compare myself to the main character, Andy (Steve Carell). And I guess he's not entirely unlike me, though of course the movie kind of exaggerates what one might expect a 40-year-old virgin to be like, for comedic effect. (In some ways I think I'm less ridiculous than him, but in other ways I'm more pathetic, but... there are other factors at work for me, which I needn't go into. Suffice to say, I don't think Andy is an Aspergian, like me.) So, I dunno... no, wait. Let me say this: I assumed this movie would be a straight-up comedy, but I was kind of hoping that after I'd seen it, I might decide to put my review under "serio-comedy," or something. But I can't. No, it's really just a comedy. Anyway... Andy works at a store called TechSmart (which is like Best Buy or Circuit City or whatever). One day his coworkers, David (Paul Rudd), Jay, and Cal (Seth Rogen), invite him to play poker with them. At the game, they're all telling sex stories, and in spite of Andy's attempts to fake a story of his own, they figure out that he's a virgin. After that, they all decide to help him get laid. Andy is deeply uncomfortable with that idea, but I must say... not nearly as uncomfortable as I would have been with it. That's the biggest difference between him and me: there is no way in hell I would have gone along with it. And despite all his protestations, he does. Incidentally, there are a few other SmartTech employees of secondary importance, including the manager, Paula (Jane Lynch) and a guy named Mooj (who was pretty funny, though I only learned the character's name online).

Um, so... Andy does not take well to the advice of his "friends." But he tries. There's one girl named Beth (Elizabeth Banks) whom he tries to pick up. But the one he really wants is Trish (Catherine Keener), who turns out to have a few kids. We never see the oldest of them, though we do see the youngest, briefly. But the only one who's important is the middle kid, Marla (Kat Dennings). And... man, lots of stuff happens throughout the movie. Mostly it's just random shit that's designed to play on the film's premise, and I guess I found some of that stuff amusing. There were things I probably found more amusing, which weren't necessarily directly tied to the whole virginity thing. And there were things I probably found a lot less amusing than some people would (what with my bring a prude, and all). But basically I thought it was a fun movie (and the fact that I was drinking helped with that). And I'm not sure what else to tell you. I don't want to spoil how it ends, or anything. It was a good ending (if not remotely like anything I could ever see happening for myself, nor indeed an ending I even want for myself). An ending I suppose I'd call stereotypically "happy," but at the same time the kind of absurd ending that could only happen in a movie like this.

Anyway... I definitely liked the movie, and I might rate it higher than I did if I weren't such a prude. (Then again, I might not.) I'm glad to have finally seen it, and I am in no way disappointed. I mean, the years I spent waiting to watch it on this specific occasion helped increase my appreciation of it. It was worth it. (Not exactly an orgasmic experience, but I'm satisfied.) But I don't expect to ever watch it again.