Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest (PG-13)
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Caution: spoilers.

So... following the events of The Curse of the Black Pearl, Elizabeth Swann and Will Turner are supposed to get married, but a guy named Lord Cutler Beckett, of the East India Trading Company, has them both arrested for helping Jack Sparrow escape from prison. However, he later offers Will a deal, wanting him to find Jack and bring Beckett his compass. Meanwhile, Jack gets a visit from Will's father, Bootstrap Bill Turner, who is now a member of the crew of Davy Jones, captain of the cursed ship the Flying Dutchman. (Of course, Davy Jones and the Flying Dutchman are, in reality, separate nautical legends, which have been paired in a new fictional way for this movie. And Davy Jones himself is a pretty creepy-looking CGI character in this movie, with a sort of octopus-like face that puts me in mind of Cthulhu, which was apparently intentional on the part of the designers.) Anyway, Jack has been captain of the Black Pearl for thirteen years now, which according to an agreement he had made with Jones, means his time is up, and he's supposed to now serve on the crew of the Dutchman. (A black spot appears on Jack's hand, which of course puts me in mind of "Treasure Island.") Oh, and aside from his crew of mutants, Jones also commands a sea monster called the Kraken, which can sink ships. So, it's understandable that Jack acts like a coward throughout most of the movie. (He's actually kind of badass at the beginning and end of the movie, but in between he's mostly just funny.)

And... it's a very long, meandering movie. Lots of things happen, which it's hard for me to keep track of. At one point, Jack and his crew are captured by natives on some island, which is where Will finds them. They manage to escape, and go see an old friend of Jack's, a voodoo priestess named Tia Dalma. Jack wants her help in locating a key, and the chest it opens. The chest contains the heart of Davy Jones, and Jack wants to barter it back to Jones in exchange for his freedom. Then Jack, Will, and the crew find the Dutchman, where Will is taken hostage, while Jack makes a deal with Jones (which has nothing to do with the chest). Meanwhile, Will is reunited with his father. Oh, and Elizabeth escaped from prison and makes her own deal with Beckett, and stows away on another ship. Eventually she catches up with Jack, as well as former commodore James Norrington (her former fiance), whose life has been ruined because of his part in Jack's escape.

Jack's compass, I must explain, points not north, but rather to whatever the one using it wants most. Jack has been unable to use it properly, but now he convinces Elizabeth that what she wants most is to find Davy Jones's chest, in order to free Will. Meanwhile, Will manages to escape from the Dutchman, with his father's help. Eventually they're all reunited at the place where the chest is buried, and there's a three-way fight between Jack, Will, and Norrington. And then Jones's crew shows up. And... there are incidental pirates who provide some comic relief (as if the whole movie wasn't already comical enough). Eventually there's a battle at sea between the Black Pearl and the Flying Dutchman and the Kraken. I don't want to say how it all turns out but... eventually Elizabeth, Will, and the crew of the Pearl go back to Dalma's place, in a scene that sets up the third movie.

So, um... what can I say? The movie was never exactly dull, but parts of it did seem vaguely tedious. There were lots of cool and/or funny and/or scary moments peppered throughout the film, though. I didn't like it as well as the first film (and I didn't like that as much as a lot of people did), but it was decent. So I look forward to watching the next movie....