there's a real cool club on the other side of town
where the real cool kids go to sit around
and talk bad about the other kids
yeah it's a real cool club and you're not part of it

there's millie, pickles and pattycakes too
and cubby's making mean jokes about you
ha ha ya little twit
yeah it's a real cool club and you're not part of it

they're a real cool bunch of die fledermausketeers
and they'll laugh at the toughskins your mom got you from sears
you dork they'll never let you in
cause it's a real cool club and you're not part of it

you're fat and ugly and an imbecile too
and that's why they draw funny pictures of you
and talk bad about all the kids
cause it's a real cool club and you're not a part of it
yeah it's a real cool club and you'll never be a part of it
yeah it's a real cool club and you'll never be a part of it